Why people have extramarital affairs?
Speak about a loaded topic that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Amusing thing, married dating have been going on since millennium. Affairs can be fraught with problems, cause sadness, and other harms. Also you have to wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness issue, money, age difference, religious education, remorse, and on and on. I expect there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I shall classify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, married woman looking for dating married men.
Why do women have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are men seeking affairs. I suppose generally though it is only the human nature, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is enjoyable and exciting, and sex makes us escape the world for a short period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people are able to turn the desire on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another individual, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos culture has erected against extra-marital affairs. For many people the yearnings will overcome their doubts and make them risk the fury of not only their relatives, but society also. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is very good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not hurt your relatives or anybody else? You would need to minimize the hazard you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the major group, gigantic in fact. There are many couples whose marriage is over, except they are comfortable in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Then there are the children to think about. Your money are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that stop them completing the sex performance, at least not with their spouse. An marital affair from time to time solves the problem while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Ignoring, sadly this is a common groung I fear. One or the other, frequently the husband is sexually neglecting his woman for a multitude of reasons. As a man I actually am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them obtainable to us guys of romance, making them “hot milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, maybe compassion is not here, could be it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Could be we have simply developed apart, our common interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposite of what you want. Maybe I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The major reason people give is, they seek the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for financial gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair